Reopened My L&I claim

So today is kind of emotional for me. I have been striving so hard to make my life better without constantly complaing about the pain I am in (some people told me they didn't like seeing my post). Well I do live in constant pain, wether you can read it on my face depends greatly on how well you know me. Of all people, the boyfriend sees it the most. He gets it confused with anger but I guess it is about the same look, since I am usually mad that I hurt lol. I laugh but it isn't always funny. About 2 1/2 months ago I went back to my Dr. and filed a reopen app because school is physically kicking my ars. My hands swell and arm never stops aching. Well as of yesterday they opened my claim back up and accept my TOS too whoop whoop. They are wanting me to do a ton of PT and see a shrink. I can handle that if it means they beleive me and are willing to fix me. I just am so freaking nervous on where this road is going to take me.
Its my own slice of nightmare here lol

Almost 3 weeks down

Wow. I have been so super busy since school started back up. I am taking Chemistry 100, English 102 and Math 95 this quarter. My hardest class by far is Chemistry, but I am giving it all I have. It scares me that a few people in my class are taking it for the second time. Not that I am smarter or even feel better than these people but I really wish to pass it the first time thru. Fingers crossed anyways. Can you believe that it is almost Halloween already. How time flies when your on your broom lol. So I guess I made the President's list but in spring they only give a shout out and not the letter of acknowledgment like the other quarters, but still awesome.

Emotional

This past week has taken its toll on me. I am so nervous for school to start next week and I have my IME app on Thursday. Just a scary week for me. I keep hoping and praying that I am making the right choices and traveling the right Path, but at this very second I feel really lost. I wish I was sitting at a cross road but it feels more like freeway on ramps to places I just don't know of. Anyways I am going to close my eyes and hope tomorrow the rushing cars from the Freeway don't run me over, maybe I am sitting at a rest area?

Sad and confused Cole makes contradictory decisions!

A Couple Days At Mom's

So Wednesday I got a phone call from my mom confirming the trip Grandma and I were taking. You see we were heading to a dr app for grandma in Wenatchee the head over to Montana to see me mom. My mom sounded so sad and worn out and I asked what was happening. Well because of her radiation treatments everything was getting thin and her intestines came loose and tried to fall out. She said it was the scariest thing ever, to look down and see them hanging out like she was having a baby. That made me cry. Well grandma and I rushed over in Thursday night and got to just be with her. I miss her like crazy and am so proud of how well she is handling all the pain. We spent all day Friday together then said our sad goodbyes. Saturday morning My Montana Grandma made breakfast and then we were back on the road home. It was the longest 3 days ever, but I wish to never let them go. I am so happy to see them all. Love them like crazy.

Labor Day Weekend

This weekend ended up so full and busy, it was just great. Starting on Friday, Jake brought the Jeep up and he drove me up Wilson to see my Grandpa's plaque. I wasn't sure if my or Grandma's car would make it up there, but we sure can and now I know lol. After taking a few moments at the spot of importance we kept on driving and came down Reecer Creek. It was such a nice day and to finish it off we had bbqed ribs at Dad's. Saturday was pretty nice also. We went back up Reecer and stopped off at Lion's Rock. I love it up there, plain and simple. We kept going and came out Cougar Gulch in Liberty. Oh and we stopped by the rocks I love lol. Sunday we ran into Gerrod and we had an impromtue wheeling trip up to Funny/Moon rocks. We saw so many Jeeps and Toyotas it was crazy. We made it back down in time for some dinner and the Sunday Night Posse games. Fun time. I am so whooped from spending 7 full days with Jake it is just overwhelming. Lol Now Grandma and I are packing our bags and going to be heading to Anaconda Mt to see my mom before school starts back up for me. Two full weeks of non stop go go go.   :-)

Shit Storm

This past month has been super crazy. I got two A's and an A- this last quarter and am very proud of myself. I turned 30!!!! Ugh but still living :-) my mom had her sugery and starts radiation on Wed. :-( we have had a huge fire burning this last week and many have lost all they own. A great friend got married to my awesome cousin this week too.  Best of all my mommy came for a visit. I am hoping that next month is a change for every one.

Amazing Weekend

Well I had such an amazing weekend that it was hard to come home. I know we have all been there a time or two, but this time seemed extra difficult. The weather was just right and the company I shared my time with was great. I can't wait to do it again. I'm too poor right now, but one of these days soon. I haven't driven so much in a course of 3 days in Forever that is for sure. At least my car was getting really good mileage since I put full synthetic oil in it. Jake tells me that is because it is smoother and hence the better mileage. I need all I can get out of my car, that is the truth